Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Is It Just Me?

Okay: Poll time.  What age do you find it appropriate for children to have a 'boyfriend' or 'girlfriend'?

When I was in middle school, it was a different day and age.  No texting, no social media.  If a boy called your house, chances are no matter where you hid with the phone (because, as we remember, the phone was attached to the wall and you had a limited radius of places to go with the phone), your mom or dad would hear the gist of the conversation.  Or the boy would maybe come over to your house.  Either way, chances were that the parents were bound to meet this other person sooner or later.  There was no secretiveness, no 'privacy'.  (Never mind I was a huge dork in middle school and never had a boy friend...that's beside the point.)

I have seen far too many children who have Facebook accounts, who are middle school aged, that have provocative profile pictures.  Who have suggestive status updates.  Who have boy-girl drama played out on the internet for all their friends to see.  Who text secretively to their friends.  Friends who the parents have no clue about.

I kinda have to be the uncool mom and say frankly...I don't like it.  Nothing good can come from all of this unsupervised  "'he-in' and she-in'". 

Am I being unreasonable?

Am I just that old fashioned?

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Birds,Bees, and Me

I'm not a prude. No, really, I'm not.  I grew up with a German mother, so we had a very European attitude about nudity...i.e., everyone has one so it's no big deal. 

So today's science lesson has me a little red-faced and nervous. 

It's about reproduction. (Who else is singing that song from Grease 2 now?)  Oh yeah. We actually have to use the technical terms for our bodies and everything.  (Oh hush-you all know you have nicknames for certain parts!  Names that make you snicker when you hear someone else unwittingly say it! that just me?  It is?  Oh.) 

(Funny story- my son's name is Will and when he was a toddler, his 'nickname' for know...was Wee Willie's Winkie.  Which was cute until his kindergarten teacher taught them song and nursery rhyme about Wee Willie Winkie.  My son came home telling me the class sang a song about HIS WINKIE. He was a legend in his own mind.)  DON'T TELL HIM I TOLD YOU.

Now, before you think my kids are completely naive, let me just say that they know how babies come out of the tummy...they know a sperm fertilizes an egg...but they have never asked how DOES that sperm get there in the first place? And I learned long ago...only answer what they are asking about.  And they have never asked that key question.

I will say that it helps having two kids of the opposite sex.  When they we smaller they used to take baths together and they noticed the difference then, so there is no shocking revelation there. 

Anyway, like I said, I'm not a prude, and I don't mind teaching my children about the Birds and the Bees...but I feel like I am exposing my self  talking about it with them.  Because I know they will look at me and figure it out about me and Daddy.  And there might be questions.  And imaginations.  And therapy bills.

So, I will grit my teeth and act like a mature adult today.  I will answer all questions scientifically and biologically.  There will even be a cute little lapbook involved.

But I might need a glass of wine when it's all over.