Tuesday, March 12, 2013

5 "Lies" Homeschool Moms Tell Others (and Themselves)

Okay, so maybe this is mostly just ME, but I think homeschool moms truly help each other and the face of homeschooling when we tear down the facades and get REAL.  Get real with each other and the rest of the world.

Here is a compilation of the top 'lies' that homeschoolers tell, whether to others or themselves...and why.

1.  "I just LOVE being with my children all day! EVERY day!" <clutches pearls>:  

No, we don't. Somedays we just want to get in the car and drive far, far away from these little people. Not that we ever would. Okay, maybe not FAR away...but at least far enough to meet another mom for a cup of coffee or shoe shopping.  Sometimes it's hard to even form a coherent thought when you have been with an unruly bunch of kids all day.

But to admit that you want to 'run away' means you are indeed NOT Supermom.  And in some homeschool circles, Supermom is what is expected of us.

(I will admit, the older the kids get, the less I feel like this.)

2.  "I am totally LOVING my curriculum!  I love everything about it!"

No, we don't. Or...at least I have yet to find a curriculum that I loved EVERYTHING about. 

To admit that we don't love it means that we just spend oodles of money on a curriculum that we feel we still need to 'tweak' in order for it to work for us.

3.  "ALL kids should be homeschooled."

This is one I have never said, but is the sentiment of many homeschool moms.

No, ALL kids should not be homeschooled.  I personally know of children who were neglected in their homeschool experience...who were denied speech therapy and special education needs.  Who probably weren't fed a decent breakfast or lunch.  Let's face it...there are children that, for them, public school is a safe haven, a place to escape their crazy parents or get a decent meal at the very least.  And to not admit that...well, you have your head in the sand.

But to admit that is to admit that yes...there ARE crazy parents who are homeschooling their kids...which certainly casts suspicion on the rest of us.  And even though it is their 'right' to homeschool...that doesn't mean it is the best thing for their kids.

4.  "All homeschooled children are PERFECTLY socialized!"

Where do I begin? :)  Children are CHILDREN, i.e., 'unfinished adults'.  Meaning, they still mess up.  They are still learning how to interact with each other and the world. 

I will say they have more opportuninties to learn that interaction with multiple ages. 

But I have seen the kids that don't know how to sit still and listen, talk back to adults, etc.  So, no, not all homeschooled kids are better socialized, rather the opportunity is there for them to learn how to interact with others...whether or not their parents take that opportunity to guide them is another story altogether.

But to admit that is to admit there are indeed 'weird homeschoolers'.  It's true. There are.

5.  "I would NEVER _________"

Fill in the blank with your choice...never send them back to school? Never use a certain curriculum or method?  As my momma used to say..never say never!

Children change.  Their needs change.  Family dynamics change.  As homeschool moms, our focus should be on what is best NOW. What was best when the kids were in early elementary may not be what is best in middle or high school.

To admit that would mean to admit that what we once proclaimed to be perfect for our kids and us may now NOT be perfect. 

Be open to change. Nothing is worse than wallowing around in stagnation because you are too resistant to take new and exciting opportunities that will benefit your children.

How about you? What are some homeschool 'lies' that need to be exposed, in your experience?

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