Heart of the Home

Yesterday evening, as we pulled into our driveway, we noticed an inordinate amount of cars in the neighbor's driveway.  Neighbors we have lived next door to since 1998.  Neighbors, come to think of it,...we haven't really seen in a few weeks.

Something deep down told me this was no barbeque, no birthday party.

I sent the kids in and went on over to their house, dread in my heart.  I prayed, "Lord, let me know what to say."  He replied, "It's better just to listen."

Our neighbor's wife died suddenly that day. 

Mrs. Judy was a vibrant woman, a babysitter for a few small children, raised her granddaughter as her own.  She had the biggest heart for animals, taking in strays at every chance she had.  When a group of us went Christmas caroling last Christmas, she was so excited she came out and sat on the front steps just beaming, loudly applauding, enjoying every second of it.

I walked into the kitchen and saw her husband sitting at the table.  If you ever wondered if it is possible to be in a house packed with people and yet be utterly alone...it's true.  He was utterly alone.

I held his hand and listened as he told me in agonizing detail of his wifes passing.  I was embarrassed to know such sacred information.  And I couldn't help but note that, although the house was so full of living, breathing people...the heart was gone.  It felt some what stifled and empty and lonesome.

As I walked back into my home later that evening,  I couldn't get the thought out of my mind....women: wives, mothers...we are all the heart beat of our home.  We are the nuturers, the comforters.  Even the little things like decorating for holidays and birthdays, cleaning the floors, cooking our meals...all of these things we do with love for the family we are blessed to live with.  And when the one who does all those little Love Things is gone...you can feel it.

So this week, when you might be tempted to gripe about the laundry or having to cook a meal, just remember this-  do these things with love.  It doesn't go unnoticed.  And when we are gone, we will be missed for it.

Be the heart of your home.

Pity Party

I know...the posts have been so upbeat lately, haven't they? (*she said with sarcasm*) 

I have been sick since Monday.  Not a 'just give me a Tylenol Cold tablet and let me plow through' kind of sick, but a 'shivering one minute burning up the next all I want to do is sleep and my body hurts all over' kind of sick. 

I have to say, Monday and Tuesday were okay.  I laid in bed literally all day long.  I didn't eat.  All I could manage was to stay awake for an hour or so then...nighty night.

Wednesday I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Thursday was exactly like Wednesday.

Friday I dragged myself to Target in the rain and bought a birthday gift for my kids' friend across the street.  Annnnd I came home and got back in bed.

Now it's Saturday.  I still have a fever.

It's getting a little ridiculous around here.  And NO, I didn't go to the doctor.  Frankly I figured I would fine by now.

I think my kids are taking applications for a new mom-one who cooks for them and washes clothes and cleans the house.   Any takers?
*sigh*  At least there is always Nyquil. 

Another Reason I am Glad Not to Live in California

Okay-before I get branded as a homophobe, let me just say right now, I am NOT. 

There, that should suffice.

Now California wants to mandate that all school children in the state study gay history. Never mind that the US is lagging behind in mathematics, science, and reading...yet, it's gay history that is the pressing issue. 

I have to ask...why?  What difference does it make who someone in history slept with?  What about Polygamist History?  Pedophiles?  Sex addicts?  Won't they feel left out and demand that THEIR cause be supported also? 

And what makes it the state's job to expose children to ANY sexuality...unless teaching biology and reproduction? 

What people do in their bedrooms should be kept in their bedrooms. 

In MY school, we teach that we are to love one another, just as Christ loved us, and we try our best.  I think that's all my kids need to know at this age.

What's Wrong With That?

There's been a lot of buzz about a restaurant that has a policy which states "No kids allowed under the age of 6".  My first reaction was, what's the big deal?

My son was a model baby.  He would sit so patiently and quietly in a restaurant high chair, never make a peep and smile at everyone around him.  Patrons would pass by our table on their way out and commend me on my sweet child.  I would pat myself on the back and consider myself the MOST AWESOME MOM EVER. 

Then I had my daughter.

Oh my stars.  Let me say, while I love that child to the ends of the Earth...she was quite the different child than my son.  She was LOUD.  She was FUSSY.  She hated to sit in the restaurant high chairs.  All of my delusions of Perfect Mom flew out the window.  One day, when she was about 18 months old, she took off running around the Back Yard Burger.  And I could NOT catch her.  I was flustered, embarrassed and yes...angry.  I swore then that I would not take them to a restaurant again until she was old enough to sit and behave.

That was a two year restaurant hiatus.  When she hit the age of about 3 or 4, she was reasonable and logical.  And knew she would get disciplined if she acted inappropriately.

I don't see why people think that everyone loves their precious little snowflakes so much that we all want to hear crying, whining, yelling.  What would they do if an adult acted that way in a restaurant? 

I don't see anything wrong with a restaurant's decision to cater to adults.  Sometimes adults want to have an enjoyable evening out without the stress of children misbehaving.

What about you?  Which stance do you take on this issue?

Seventy-Seven Times

"I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times."  Jesus Christ

Who knows the question that is the answer to?  Anyone?  Bueller?  Bueller? Bueller?

It's how many times we are supposed to forgive someone.

Any of you who follow this thing I call a blog might have read about the kids up the street treating my son like garbage.  Boys who were once friends -two of whom were considered his BEST friends- decided to tell him he was worthless. 

Here's an update.

My son has had nothing to do with any of them.  Cold turkey.  He has had a great summer enjoying his homeschool group of friends and really hasn't missed these other kids.

Now certain kids have been banned from playing at neighbor's houses.  One has moved away.  Now some of them want to be friends with my son again.

At first, the momma bear inside me want to growl and tell him to never speak to those turkeys again. 

But, alas, what does Jesus tell us?  Seventy seven times.  I can't argue with that.

So he went and played some backyard baseball with them and had a great time.

However...if he comes home again feeling like a huge ZERO, I might have to dig up the Biblical quote about not being anyone's 'punching bag' either.

But for now...it feels good to forgive.

Art, Art, Bo-Bart

If I were left to my own devices, I would only teach art, grammar, creative writing and Latin.  Maybe geography.  As a kid, the only class in school that I truly loved and couldn't get enough of was art.  Many homeschool moms (and public school for that matter) may view art as 'fluff', unimportant to education.  I disagree.  It's the one subject where there is NO WRONG ANSWER.  You can express your thoughts, feelings and emotions in a way that is safe.  I also love to mix in art history as well, focusing on the great artists and their lives and great works.  To me, that is all part of a well rounded education.  So, even if my kids end up with jobs where they have to ask "Do you want fries with that?" they will still be able to tell you who painted 'Washington Crossing the Delaware'  and 'Sunflowers'.

 I LOVE THIS BOOK.  It not only provides a brief biography of each artist, but includes an art project 'in the style' of that artist.  My kids love to do the projects.  It is so convenient to have all of that together in one place.  (Something else I have planned are cultural art project coinciding with our history/geography lessons...for example, when studying Japan in history, we will use a Japanese artist and ther technique.)

 This one is a new one for us.  It is more of a technical curriculum, focusing on things such as line, shape, value, balance, etc.  It too includes bios and examples of great artists and their work AND tells a bit about what was going on in that time in history.  Very cool.

Okay, so I know this isn't art, it's music,  but it's another subject viewed as 'fluff'.  You get lessons on each great composer AND a cd with selections of their music.  Which I plan on playing as we do our art lessons.  Because I am kooky like that.

So, there you have it for my 'fluff' stuff!  How about you?  Are these subjects important to you?  What approach do you take with your kids?

Praise, Not Flattery

Perhaps once in a hundred years a person may be ruined by excessive praise, but surely once in every minute someone dies inside for lack of it.Cecil G. Osborne

Sometimes it is hard being with your kids all day long.  Okay- A LOT of times it is hard.  And sometimes it seems all you can see is what everyone is NOT doing. 

Let me just preface this by saying that I don't espouse the notion that 'every child is a WINNER!' if they don't earn it.  Too many free trophies are handed out to this generation of kids that they may or may not have earned.  BUT, I believe everyone has something worth praising.  Sometimes it may only be "I am so glad to see you put the cap back on the toothpaste tube!"...but it is still something.

Today, my challenge is this- to praise my children more than I scold them.  Don't get me wrong...praise and flattery are two different things.  Praise is earned through actually doing something.  Flattery are words just used to make someone feel good.  Today I will try to find things to praise my kids for. 

As I read in Michelle Duggar' book, and I am paraphrasing here...be careful what you praise your children for, they will want to do more of it.  Be careful what you criticize your children for, they will never want to do it again.

So...who's up for this challenge?  I know I am.