Last night I dropped my daughter off for a sleep over at a friends house. I was introduced to the teenaged son of the household.
He stood up and shook my hand.
Myself, my hubby and the other girls mom and dad made our way into the garage while having a nice conversation. It was raining cats and dogs, so we stayed in the garage to talk.
After a few minutes, the teenager came out to the garage with an umbrella. I thought "Maybe he has somewhere to go and we are in his way." But he just hung around.
Fifteen minutes later, as we went to exit the garage and make a dash to the minivan...the teen with the umbrella quickly came to my side and held the umbrella over me and walked me to the car.
I almost felt embarrassed. I was definately impressed. I have never had anyone do that for me. Well, maybe my husband did years ago, but never a teenaged kid.
It had me thinking all the way home.
THAT'S what I want my son to be like. And who is going to teach him this? Me.
We mothers with sons are raising the next generation of men. It's up to us to produce men of good character.
Raise them to never NEVER *EVER* hit a female. (And by the same token, raise our daughters that it is never ever ever okay to BE hit by a male....even her brother. I know too many moms that let their sons just pummel their little sisters and just sit there and do nothing, I guess thinking that kids will be kids. Absolutely not. Unacceptable.)
Raise them to know that they have to WORK for a living. Don't expect the world to hand over a house, clothes, food...no sir. Get out and get a job. Nothing is worse than grown men who have the attitude of "The world is picking on me!" Get over yourself and give the world something positive to say about you!
Raise them to respect other people's boundaries. Emotional boundaries as well as physical boundaries.
Raise them to defend the defenseless.
Raise them to be respectful to other adults. To look them in the eye and speak to them when spoken to. To extend a hand to shake.
Raise them to become good conversationalists. To not interrupt others and not to bring up topics that may hurt the feelings of others or cause hard feelings.
Raise them to stand their ground and defend what they know to be right and good.
Raise them to have good table manners. And never wear a hat to the table. And always wear a shirt when you sit down to the table.
Raise them to try to look clean and neat, not dirty and sloppy. And call me crazy, but please don't go around in public without your shirt and shoes. There is no reason for you not to have these things on.
Take pride in your appearance! The Bible says our body is a temple...treat it like one!
Raise them to do everything they do to the best of their ability.
And best of all....teaching them these qualities costs nothing. You don't have to be 'rich' to teach your children the qualities of good character.
But the payback...well...it's priceless.
I agree with almost everything in your post EXCEPT I think it's Dad that needs to teach these things. I think the horrible mess we are in now is due to undervaluing men in their parenting roles. Our generation of lost boys shows the result.
ReplyDeleteJennifer...true dat! However, even single moms can raise exceptional young men if they have to.
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